No more medicine
by HetaliaFangirlAru
Summary: How did it come to this, lying on the floor pleading for his best friend's life? Highschool AU, UsUk. Based on a combination of the song Medicine by Daughter, and a conversation with my best friend. Warning, can be depressing. Contains emotional triggers and realistically pleasant ending. Rated Teen for content.


In all of Alfred's years, he never would have believed it, but here they are. On the ground in a stall in the boys restroom during fifth period, hugging tight onto each other because lives did truly depend on it. Well, one directly.

* * *

They met in 8th grade, but weren't very close of friends. In fact, ALfred was pretty sure Arthur hated him, he was harsh all the time and would look down on Alfred constantly. "What, why are you cowering? Won't your superheros save you from any danger? That bloke looks big enough" Arthur would say, scowling, poking a drawing sticking out from Alfred's backpack. Misfortunately for Alfred, he was a bit cowardly and wanted to be protected. He was strong enough to defend himself, but he was afraid of hurting anything.

Over the next year, they became closer, first casual friends then best of friends. Arthur got into some bad habits, smoking and had sex with a girl he thought he loved. That girl ended up using him for his body and left Arthur colder emotionally, but by this time the other young man had already lodged his way in Arthur's heart. Alfred did everything he could to cheer Arthur up, and succeeded.

The next couple of years they had multiple classes together, and spent a lot of free time with each other, learning more and more about each other. It got to the point where Alfred would openly say he loved Arthur and Arthur would admit (red-faced) that he loves Alfred too. Countless sleepovers, notes passed in classes about their attractive classmates, and long conversations about where their lives were headed.

Finally they were in their senior year of high school. Alfred would smile at Arthur and exclaim "We're almost adults! Ready yet, bro?" , to which Arthur would chuckle and reply "Of course, it's been long enough.". That scared little boy with the blue eyes and that crass young green eyed boy were facing their last year with bright hopes. That was before Arthur started acting oddly, though.

* * *

Alfred began noticing it around Thanksgiving time, around when Arthur's father passed away the year before. Arthur was talking to him when he leaned back suddenly as if he was about to be attacked. " Ahh what the hell, a flying rabbit!" He shrieked, stunning Alfred who saw nothing. Arthur stared off for a second before saying "... Of course I can see you, why else would I have been surprised?!" He turned to Alfred and laughed, a little hysterically. " A-Al, what's going on?"

Alfred shook his head and raised his hands, palms up, in front of him and shrugged. " Dude, you're freaking me out, I don't understand what you're talking about. What do you see?" Not suspecting the truth, Alfred talked him into going to a counselor.

* * *

The prognosis: Arthur had temporal lobe seizures, or TLS and the pamphlet called it. This meant Arthur would see things and hear things that weren't really there as a form of seizure caused by a part of his brain that controls short term memory and emotive response. To Alfred that meant that his best friend is now seeing things because his brain is a little messed up. The counselors and his mother think the cause was depression from his father's death, but the doctors believe there's no definite answer. To try and limit these they put Arthur on antidepressants. Alfred was scared when he started at first because they would hit Arthur with a full force and Arthur would just lie down, unable to think clearly. After a few changes of medicine Arthur was more of less back to normal, though now he saw beings that weren't there. There were some recurring ones that Alfred took note of, namely a flying rabbit of a green shade, and a fairy. The kids at school had no clue what was going on, they just knew Arthur was different. Most people left him alone, but one boy out of a group of bullies didn't. His real name was Francis, but he often referred to himself as Francis-Henri.

Arthur grew close to this boy, but over the course of a month Francis had broke his heart seemingly beyond repair. Promises of love and stability were words of lies. Arthur's goal in life, to become a teacher, was mocked endlessly by Francis's friends after the break up. The only thing that kept him from leaving was Alfred. Alfred was his only friend.

* * *

Alfred knew Arthur had difficulty recently dealing with that asshole Francis and his equally asshole-y best friends. He didn't know they would put the thought of suicide in Arthur's mind, though. Here they were, though. Crying as hard as he could, Arthur was holding onto Alfred like a lifeline. Alfred was petting his back, murmuring to him "I know, it's alright, I'm sorry, I know.".

" I can't help it! They don't understand! I don't want to live anymore, why would they go out of their way to make me feel this?! I just want to die!" Arthur sobbed into Alfred's neck, causing Alfred to stiffen.

" No. NO. You can't die, there's too much to live for. The principal said you can go on homestudy, remember? You've got a second chance,you could go home. Escape it all. You could still be what you want to,who you are when it's me and you. Ignore what they say, it's just irrelevant." Alfred had a grip on Arthur's shoulders, holding him just far enough back so he could maintain eye contact.

" Alfred, you don't understand. There's no place for me. When we leave this building, I'm going to find a quiet place to end myself. I'm sorry, I know I'm failing you, but I can't take this anymore. Pressure from Mum to succeed in life even though she didn't, I don't know exactly which gender I love but I'm not getting what I need from either of them, and now everyone is either mad at me for being weird or making fun of me for being weird. I can't take this anymore, Al, I just can't."

By the end of Arthur's speech, both were crying, Arthur even harder now. " You can't! You just can't die Arthur, I need you. I want to help you but all I can say is ' Take your medicine, life isn't hard, it's just medicine.'. I know it's hard right now but there is so much waiting for us, so much we haven't experienced yet. All those people are assholes who can rot in hell, they can't possibly love you how you need it. There is someone who can though, believe me. There's someone out there who's feeling the same way you are and if you die, they'll never meet you. Please don't do it, please. " Alfred could barely speak through the pain in his chest at the thought of his best friend gone. The knowledge that Arthur felt this way and he couldn't help hurt badly.

Arthur replied " Al, I'm sorry. I can't be as positive as you. There is someone out there for you, but there's no one who should have to put up with me. All I can do is hurt others and be hurt, what's the point of living? They say high school is the best years of our life, well this sucks! If this is the best I need to end it now before I hurt some more." Arthur tried to stand up but Alfred held on to him, making an almost screaming sound.

" Arthur, no! You've got a warm heart and a beautiful brain and you need to save it! There is always someone for you! Even if you feel alone in the world there will always be someone there for you, I can swear it. You just have to find them. You have me. I have you. I can't lose you! Please, don't do it." Tears streaming, Alfred said softly " I can't live without you. I mean it. If you die I'm dying right after you. You're my best friend and I love you. Please... Please. Life will get better. I'm not old enough to give examples, but I know." Alfred's grip loosened a bit and Arthur pulled free. He started to walk toward the door and the end of his life, but was stopped. It's true, although he hurt right now, there were good times. Before the medicine...

Arthur turned around and came back to the ground with Arthur and hugged him tight. "... Okay." Arthur's voice stayed quiet, though the force behind his words were louder than thunder. " Okay Al, I won't do it. Please, don't cry. It will be okay. I won't do it." Arthur was shaking, knowing how close he'd come to the end. It would be the end of one thing though, those pills. No more.

* * *

Years later, Arthur and Alfred passed through college, Arthur becoming an English teacher and Alfred becoming a mechanic. Arthur stopped taking his medicine for a while, but his depression remained. Eventually a study showed that the particular brand of antidepressants they gave him had a high chance of backfiring. They changed the pills and Arthur quickly changed himself, never losing the depression but never letting it rule his life again.


End file.
